CALID Chapter 58

Enlightenment

The rain wasn’t as heavy as it was at the beginning, but it still fell steadily. Pedestrians hurried along the streets of Nandu, occasionally casting doubtful glances at the young man walking silently with an umbrella. He was dressed extravagantly, holding a sugar figure in his hand. Despite the umbrella, he was already soaked through, water dripping steadily from him as he moved forward with a pensive gaze, seeming lost in thought.

Yet, the young man’s steps were steady. He naturally made way for other pedestrians and didn’t seem distracted, which was rather strange.

Duan Xu was indeed lost in thought.

He was thinking about how he had been so distant just now that he hadn’t even seen clearly what He Simu was holding in her hand, let alone discern the shape of the crow. That was just an excuse he casually made up.

He didn’t even know how he recognized her.

Yes, how did he recognize her? How did he, in a moment, recognize the soul dwelling within myriad ordinary unfamiliar appearances?

He had only known this soul for less than half a year.

Duan Xu couldn’t figure it out. He then thought about how everyone said forgetting was an extremely easy thing to do. Perhaps one day, when he had grey hair at his temples, reaching the age his father mentioned, when he couldn’t remember his childhood sweetheart anymore, could he still recognize her at a glance in the vast sea of people?

For some reason, he felt he still could.

Perhaps by that time, he would no longer have the capital for wilfulness, unable to run anymore, with dim eyes, staggering, unable to produce a loud voice, not knowing what to say to her. When that time came, even if he recognized her, would he still chase after her recklessly as he did today?

He thought for a long time and then felt that he still would.

Why?

As Duan Xu walked, he found a wall of green bricks ahead of him. He paused for a moment, then raised his umbrella and looked up, seeing the ivy-covered city wall, verdant and striking. He had reached the edge of the city wall.

This road had come to an end, with nowhere left to avoid.

At this moment, it was as if dawn had broken, and the puzzles that had plagued him for so long suddenly became clear. Duan Xu suddenly burst into laughter, laughing uncontrollably, trembling all over. As he laughed, he lost his umbrella, covering his eyes with his hand, slowly crouching against the wall in the pouring rain.

When his temples were grey, using a cane to chase after someone, how ridiculous was that? How could such a ridiculous thing exist in this world?

Why did he do such foolish things?

From youth to old age, from birth to death, life is a long time. How could he be so certain that he would never forget?

He liked her. She was the first girl he liked, and he couldn’t even figure out what kind of ending liking someone should lead to.

She was just the first girl who awakened him.

Just the first girl who reached out to him in the pitch-black darkness.

The first girl who made him feel the beauty and pain of the world.

A girl who always talked tough but never really hurt him, even fed him medicine with her own hands.

A lonely and proud girl, not expecting to be understood by anyone, not expecting to be missed or thanked, just doing what she believed was right.

A girl who always called him Duan Xu, Little Fox, Duan Shunxi, saying, “I’ll protect you, but don’t like me.”

A girl whose life was long, who would eventually forget him, but couldn’t be forgotten by him in his brief decades of life.

Rainwater rolled down from between Duan Xu’s covered eyes, mixed with the water seeping from between his fingers, dripping onto the stone brick floor, pattering softly.

It was ironic. His original wish was to be a normal person, to rid himself of the shadows known only to the heavens, to control his emotions and live like an ordinary person.

Or rather, to live disguised as an ordinary person.

He tried very hard to do this, but now everything was contrary to his original wish. Ghost King He Simu had become his new, most outrageous wish.

He didn’t know what kind of ending liking someone should lead to, but he saw his own ending. He resisted in every possible way, but now he accepted his fate.

They were all right, and they were all wrong.

Indeed, in this world, no one can’t live without anyone else.

But he couldn’t live without He Simu.

When the eldest mistress from the Duan family, Wu Wanqing, saw her younger brother-in-law in the corridor of the mansion, she was truly surprised. Her younger brother-in-law, Duan Shunxi, the most popular young talent in Nandu, actually came back soaked and dishevelled, yet he clearly still held an umbrella in his hand.

As soon as he saw her, Duan Xu immediately raised his index finger to his lips, smiling and said, “Don’t tell anyone about my appearance like this, Sister-in-law.”

Wu Wanqing nodded, then realized he hadn’t come through the main gate; he had actually climbed over the wall. She was somewhat puzzled and asked, “How did you get so wet? Is the umbrella broken?”

Duan Xu shook his head and said, “The umbrella is fine; I just didn’t bother to open it.”

“Without an umbrella in such heavy rain, you’ll get soaked, and a cold wind could make you sick. How can you not take care of yourself like this?”

Mrs. Duan, who was devoted to Buddhism and seldom concerned herself with household matters, had grown accustomed to managing things in the Duan household. Unconsciously, she found herself lecturing Duan Xu as if he were her own son.

Duan Xu chuckled softly, twirling the umbrella in his hand, murmuring, “Indeed, knowing the principles of living well but not adhering to them… it’s madness.”

Wu Wanqing sensed there was more to his words and couldn’t help asking, “Younger brother-in-law… do you have something on your mind?”

“Nothing at all. By the way, Sister-in-law, are you quite close with Lady Wang, the wife of the Minister of Household?”

“We do have regular interactions. Why do you ask?”

“Today, when I went to Jade Tower, I happened to encounter Master Wang and his sister, Su Yi. Master Wang asked me to escort Su Yi home. But while I was talking to Su Yi, I noticed a familiar face in the street, possibly an assassin from Danzhi. So, I immediately got up to chase after that person, completely forgetting about Su Yi and failing to fulfil my promise to escort her home. Please convey my apologies to Lady Wang when you next see her.” Duan Xu spoke casually but sincerely.

Wu Wanqing looked at Duan Xu’s soaked clothes and felt that there must be more to the story, but she didn’t feel the need to delve deeper into it. She simply agreed, “Alright.”

Duan Xu nodded with a smile, about to head to his room, but then he turned back as if remembering something and looked at Wu Wanqing, saying, “Sister-in-law, may I ask you a question?”

Wu Wanqing nodded in confusion.

“Sister-in-law, you and my elder brother grew up together, presumably truly in love, right?”

Wu Wanqing widened her eyes in surprise, then blushed slightly and said somewhat embarrassedly, “Why… why do you ask?”

“Father has been arranging my marriage recently, so I’m curious. After all, there are many couples like father and mother who lead a plain and respectful life together for a lifetime.”

“Between Shunyi and me, I think we have mutual affection.”

“How can Sister-in-law be sure that my elder brother likes you?”

“Well… it’s just obvious. When we were fifteen or sixteen, he would be happy when I got close to him. He’d get embarrassed when others teased us, always finding excuses to come to the mansion to see me. When he saw me, he’d blush and speak quickly and incoherently. Isn’t that how liking someone is?”

Duan Xu seemed to ponder seriously for a moment before smiling ambiguously, “I see. Thank you, Sister-in-law.”

He Simu always appeared calm, gentle, and indifferent in front of him, as if she always had his best interests at heart, yet remained unmoved.

None of these behaviours matched what his sister-in-law had described, but then again, her temperament and personality were quite different from his elder brother’s. How much of her kindness and indulgence toward him was mixed with genuine affection?

Back in his room, Duan Xu tidied his soaked clothes, contemplating that he might have to gamble again.

Meanwhile, after parting ways with Duan Xu, He Simu walked through the streets of Nandu under the umbrella of Feng Yi, with Ziji quietly following behind.

He Simu gazed ahead, her unremarkable appearance exuding an aura of majesty. She spoke with a hint of displeasure, “Feng Yi, your divination skills are improving.”

He had said there was a beautiful view on the streets of Nandu, even in heavy rain, prompting her to come out. But after only a few steps, she was surprised to see General Duan sitting upstairs at Jade Tower. Who was the person sitting in front of him? Their relationship seemed rather unusual.

Feng Yi’s birchwood cane tapped on the ground as he sighed innocently, saying, “Isn’t this just a coincidence? Who knew we would encounter him here?”

This excuse seemed too fake.

Rainwater trickled down the umbrella ribs, and their vision blurred in the heavy rain. After a moment of silence, He Simu asked, “How has Duan Shunxi been lately?”

“He’s been very well. General Duan is currently one of the most appreciated young talents in the court, riding high on his success. However, it seems he’s a bit weak lately, probably due to his injuries on the battlefield. And getting soaked in this weather might make him sick. Speaking of illness, I have plenty of experience. People like him, who seem healthy on the surface, can be in grave danger once they fall ill. It’s perilous; a slight carelessness with a minor ailment can turn it into a serious illness, and then…”

Feng Yi’s words were cut short by the warning look from He Simu, and he swallowed the words “Oh no” that were about to escape his lips.

She sneered, “Do you feel uncomfortable if you don’t say a few words?”

“Well, isn’t that the case? You, my venerable ancestor, understand me best.” Feng Yi grinned, his almond-shaped eyes exuding a mischievous charm. He raised his hand to his lips, whispering, “What, are you afraid I’ll jinx him to death? Don’t worry, this statement has no curse.”

“I know.”

“You know? So, you’re simply worried about him and don’t want to hear about his potential demise?”

“If he’s not feeling well, you should speak less.”

If this guy weren’t the descendant of her uncle and aunt, and if she hadn’t taken care of him for a few years in his childhood, He Simu would have already beaten him into a pulp. After all, Feng Yi had grown up in a place like Xingqing Palace, where discipline was strict. How did he end up like this?

“In the end, which aspect did you inherit from your uncle and aunt?” He Simu couldn’t help but inquire.

“Probably… being good-looking,” Feng Yi pointed to his own face.

“…”