Gu Jianian did not catch the implication behind his words. She only shook her head.
She had been afraid he would not come.
She stopped talking and quietly ate her ice cream.
Before coming to Yunmo, Gu Jianian rarely ate ice cream and rarely drank cold drinks. Her parents said eating cold things made it easy to get sick, and if she got sick, she would have to go to hospital, which would delay her studies.
After coming to Yunmo, she often went to the village shop to buy those one-yuan milky pudding ice lollies. Later, Grandma bought a whole batch at once and froze them in the little freezer at home.
Grandma said people were not actually that fragile. As long as you did not overdo it, eating ice in summer and spicy food in winter did not really come with so many taboos.
She just had not expected the ice cream at the market to taste so much better than the ones from the village shop. Gu Jianian ate one mouthful after another, unable to stop.
Seeing how happily she was eating, Chi Yan felt as if he had gained a little appetite too, so he began eating as well.
As he ate, he asked, “I only remembered when I heard your grandma mention it just now. When you were little, you were called Tingting, right? Ting as in *tingting yuli*?”
Gu Jianian shook her head. “It’s the *ting* from ‘to stop.’ Grandma said I was too restless when I was little and always ran wild all over the mountains, so she named me Tingting, hoping I’d stop for a bit.”
Chi Yan recalled it for a moment, then nodded. “A little.”
“A little what?”
“A little wild. The type who got excited around people. And ever since you were little, you were…”
He glanced at the ice cream on the table, more than half-eaten by her, and said, “Especially good at eating. Back then, every weekend when I went to your grandma’s house for meals, you’d look forward to me coming. Your grandma thought you really liked playing with me, but actually, you were just waiting for me to bring you snacks from the shop by the school gate. One time I forgot, and you ignored me the entire weekend.”
“…”
Gu Jianian could not remember any of it. Embarrassed, she said, “I was too young then. I didn’t know any better. And I’m not especially good at eating now. That’s just your imagination.”
It was only because she had not had much appetite these past few days, and today she had suddenly figured some things out, so she wanted to eat a little more.
Hearing this, Chi Yan looked at her with raised brows.
Looking at her now, this child really had changed a lot. People said you could see a person’s future character from the age of three, but she had completely become another person.
He could not help asking, “Are you so grown-up now? Why do you need to be that sensible?”
Gu Jianian asked in a muffled voice, “Isn’t it good to be sensible?”
“Besides… I’m not as sensible as you think.”
As she spoke, she lowered her head, drew in her expression, and silently ate her ice cream without speaking again.
Chi Yan raised his brows slightly.
Why was she upset now?
Children’s thoughts really were hard to guess.
After the two of them finished their ice cream, Gu Jianian went to the side of the shop and bought another one, planning to take it home and freeze it for tomorrow.
After thinking about it, Grandma could not eat cold things, so she only bought one for He Ji Tong.
After paying and turning around, she found Chi Yan looking at her in surprise.
His gaze slowly moved from the two portions of ice cream in her hands to her stomach.
Gu Jianian understood his look. “…”
“This one is for Brother Ji Tong,” she explained, then pointed at the other one, her voice growing smaller. “This one is for… for Gulu.”
She even added, “Gulu is the cat my grandma keeps. It especially likes eating ice cream.”
Chi Yan did not expose her. “Oh.”
The two of them slowly wandered back toward the arcade.
Past seven in the morning, the sunlight had lost its gentleness and become blazing hot.
The morning market was nearly over. Some of the roadside vendors had begun packing up their stalls, and most of the pedestrians had finished their shopping and were returning home in groups.
Gu Jianian pushed open the door of the arcade.
At the game machine by the entrance, He Ji Tong’s character was being brutally beaten into the ground by a child.
“Brother Ji Tong, we’re done shopping. Shall we go find Grandma?”
He Ji Tong was frantically pressing the joystick in desperation. Hearing Gu Jianian’s voice, it was as if he had encountered a saviour.
He turned back almost tearfully, pushed all the remaining game tokens in front of the boy fighting him, and said, “Big brother has to go now. My friend has something urgent to tell me. Very urgent. I’ll play with you seriously next time.”
The little boy curled his lip with a look of disdain. “Even if you got serious, you still couldn’t beat me.”
“…”
He Ji Tong squeezed out of the crowd with a gloomy face, spreading his hands as he complained, “Why are these kids so vicious? Don’t they know how to respect their elders? Chi Yan, why don’t you avenge me? You could definitely beat them until they run home crying for their mums.”
Chi Yan refused cleanly. “Being bullied by children and bullying children are both pretty shameful.”
He Ji Tong: “…”
He tried to provoke him. “I think you might not necessarily be able to beat that kid either.”
Chi Yan remained unmoved. “Oh. Then I can’t beat him.”
“As long as I can beat you, that’s enough.”
He Ji Tong: “…”
Gu Jianian could not help laughing, and handed him the ice cream in her hand.
He Ji Tong raised his brows, smiled, and reached out to pat her arm. “Wow, our Little sister Jianian is still the best. You still remembered me, unlike certain people who don’t recognise family or friends.”
As he spoke, he opened the lid of the ice cream and dug out a large spoonful.
The three of them wandered around together for a while longer, then went to the rice shop to pick up Grandma before driving back to Yunmo.
On the way back, Chi Yan drove, while He Ji Tong sat in the passenger seat, playing games as he ate his ice cream.
He could not stop eating and could not help turning back to ask Gu Jianian, “What flavour is this? It’s pretty good.”
“I think it’s cheese yoghurt flavour.”
“Oh, no wonder it tastes a bit sour. What about yours?”
“Mine is the same as yours.”
Seeing him eat so happily, Gu Jianian could not help feeling a little greedy.
She had already forgotten the lie she had told earlier. She opened the lid of her ice cream and scooped a bite.
It really was delicious, but… it seemed the chocolate one she had eaten with Chi Yan earlier was still a little sweeter.
There was no more conversation along the way.
Grandma was resting with her eyes closed. Bored, Gu Jianian took out her phone.
First, as usual, she checked her WeChat messages. There were still no new messages from Beilin.
The matters in Beilin really seemed very far away from her now.
Perhaps those secrets had been buried in her memories with her departure, and would never be discovered again?
She thought this with a heart full of relief.
Gu Jianian exited WeChat at ease, opened her photo album, and browsed through the photos she had taken at the market today, feeling a little disappointed.
She had only taken photos of the street scenes, pedestrians, and some novel, interesting stalls. She had been too embarrassed to take even one photo of him.
Until she reached the mirror selfie taken at the ice cream shop.
She quietly tilted the phone screen more toward herself and zoomed in on the photo with two fingers.
At first glance, the mirror seemed to have captured only herself. But after zooming in, he was there in the upper left corner, propping his chin on his hand and leaning lazily against the table.
At the instant she pressed the shutter, he seemed to have noticed that she was taking a selfie and had opened his eyes to look at her.
Gu Jianian stared at it for a long time, then opened her notes app and wrote a short entry.
“Today, we went to the morning market together, ate wontons together, and even ate the same ice cream together. Later, I’m going to invite him to my coming-of-age ceremony.”
Then she added the photo.
She had always had the habit of recording short notes in her notes app, but they were all daily study tasks, reading notes, and the like. She had never recorded her own emotions and daily life before.
This was the first entry, and it was about him.
Gu Jianian turned off her phone and lifted her head to look toward the front of the car.
The cuff of his hoodie sleeve was rolled up a little, revealing the fair skin of his forearm.
His fingers resting on the steering wheel were long and slender, the joints distinct, dappled with shadows from the trees.
It was as if she had hidden away a secret that belonged only to her.
*
A few minutes later, the car stopped.
Chi Yan opened the back door and, seeing it through to the end, helped Grandma out of the car.
Grandma walked beneath the osmanthus tree and looked with a smile at Gu Jianian, who was getting out from the other side.
She was carrying a bag of colourful stationery, a faint smile on her fair face. Compared with that morning, she seemed completely refreshed.
She even had a trace of how she had looked as a child.
Grandma could not help calling out to her, “Tingting, come here quickly. Stand beside me and let Little Chi take a photo of us.”
Although Gu Jianian did not know why Grandma had suddenly suggested taking a photo, she still obediently opened the camera on her phone and handed it to Chi Yan.
She stood beside Grandma, reached out to wrap an arm around her thin shoulders, and stiffly made a peace sign at the camera.
Chi Yan took several photos from a distance, then checked their expressions.
A moment later, he walked over and handed the photos to Grandma to see.
Gu Jianian noticed a strange look flash across his face. Thinking it was because she did not look good in the photos, she could not help muttering, “I’m not photogenic.”
But Grandma was very satisfied, looking over the photos carefully. “Nonsense. How are you not photogenic? My Tingting is beautiful.”
Gu Jianian leaned over to look and froze for a moment.
They were actually beautiful. Even beautiful in a way she had never noticed before.
In the photo, the old woman and the young girl stood leaning against each other beneath the lush osmanthus tree, both smiling until their eyes curved.
One had a head full of silver hair, the other black hair falling to her shoulders. Between their brows and eyes, they shared a fifty or sixty percent resemblance.
Gu Jianian suddenly remembered that during a casual chat, her second uncle had once said that Grandma had been a famous beauty in the surrounding villages when she was young.
She completely agreed.
Although the old lady’s eyes were now full of wrinkles and age spots had inevitably appeared on her face, she was still a bright, energetic, beautiful old woman.
And Gu Jianian herself was actually much prettier than she had been in high school.
Her hair grew quickly. In middle school, to save her time washing it, her parents took her to get it cut every month, making sure it only reached below her ears.
The style was also the most old-fashioned kind. After being thinned inside and out, it clung tightly to her scalp, making her look like a little boy from behind.
But after a few months, her hair had grown much longer, gradually passing her chin and almost reaching her shoulders.
The thicker, no-longer-thinned crown of hair made her face look especially small.
She had even learned how to smile.
Compared with the dull, greyish outfit and the worried, bland, lifeless face on her student ID, the current her seemed to have slowly shed that gloomy, murky shell, revealing her original face.
Compared with Gu Jianian’s surprise, Grandma quietly grew teary-eyed as she looked at the photo. She kept saying, “Good, good.”
Her eyes held both comfort and heartache. “The last time the two of us stood under this osmanthus tree and took a photo was ten years ago. That day, your parents came to take you away from me. You hugged this osmanthus tree and cried, refusing to leave no matter what. So I told you, let’s take a photo under the osmanthus tree together. Once you’ve finished studying smoothly in Beilin, come back to see Grandma.”
“In the blink of an eye, ten years have passed. My Tingting has grown taller than Grandma.”
Gu Jianian’s eyes reddened too.
In these ten years, she had not returned to Yunmo even once. Every holiday had been spent on homework and tutoring, yet she had not even managed to achieve the words “smoothly and successfully.”
She had failed Grandma’s expectations.
After taking the photo, Grandma originally wanted to invite the two young men to stay for a meal. But He Ji Tong had to return to Zhushan soon, while Chi Yan wanted to go back and catch up on sleep, so she could only give up.
Gu Jianian walked them to the car. After hesitating for a while, she gathered her courage and asked, “Next Wednesday is my eighteenth birthday. Grandma said she wants to hold a simple celebration. Will… will you come?”
He Ji Tong raised his brows. “A coming-of-age ceremony? That’s a big deal. Little sister Jianian, what present do you want?”
Gu Jianian looked toward Chi Yan. He did not speak, but his brows lifted almost imperceptibly.
At least he did not refuse.
Gu Jianian curved her lips, then looked back at He Ji Tong and shook her head. “I don’t need presents. It’s just a simple meal. You only need to come.”
After saying that, she picked up her things and prepared to say goodbye, but suddenly heard Chi Yan speak.
“Help her carry the things inside.”
He was speaking to He Ji Tong.
Unhappy at being ordered around, He Ji Tong curled his lip. “Why? Were you born without hands or without legs?”
Gu Jianian looked down at the two bags that were not heavy at all and quickly waved her hand. “No need, I can carry them myself.”
Chi Yan was silent for a moment, then said to He Ji Tong, “…Help her carry them in, and I’ll teach you how to play games tonight.”
“…”
“Why the hell didn’t you say so earlier?”
He Ji Tong swiftly opened the car door, got out, took the bags from Gu Jianian’s hands, and strode into the house, his movements smooth and effortless.
Gu Jianian stood frozen in place with empty hands, looking at Chi Yan in confusion.
He glanced at He Ji Tong’s retreating figure, then slowly walked to Gu Jianian’s side and looked down at her from above.
Gu Jianian belatedly understood. “…You have something to say to me?”
“Mm.”
What did he have to say that required sending He Ji Tong away?
Gu Jianian’s ears felt a little hot, and she said unnaturally, “Then… say it.”
Chi Yan hesitated for once, seemingly considering what to say next.
A moment later, he slowly said, “When I exited the camera app just now, I accidentally saw your notes app in the background. You forgot to close it.”
“Sorry.”
“…”
Saw her… notes app?
The note she had written in the car just now?
At that instant, Gu Jianian’s brain shut down. When she came back to herself, her face instantly flushed red, then immediately turned pale.
How had she forgotten to close it?
How could she have made such a stupid mistake?
She was finished.
He knew everything.
He had even said “sorry.”
At a time like this, even thinking with her toes, she knew what that apology meant.
No wonder he had sent He Ji Tong away.
Was his next sentence going to be a rejection?
For the first time in her life, Gu Jianian had liked someone. She had only just struggled out of the mindset of wanting to give up and decided to quietly like him, yet now it had ended so suddenly.
And in the most embarrassing way possible.
Her head buzzed, her eyes began to sting, and she almost had the urge to run away.
Would she no longer be able to go to his house to read books?
Would he never see her again?
Gu Jianian lowered her head with a pale face, her heart filled with the shame of being exposed and the sadness of a failed secret crush.
Like a child who had done something wrong, she did not dare look directly at him at all.
But in the next second, she heard a hint of reassurance in his carefully chosen tone.
“Don’t be scared. It’s normal to have these kinds of feelings at your age. And only I saw it. I didn’t mean to pry into your privacy, and I won’t tell anyone.”
“But my cousin has been careless and thick-headed since he was young. He’s overly familiar with everyone. From another angle, sometimes he might not have much sense of boundaries, so it’s easy for people to misunderstand…”
As Chi Yan spoke, he paused for a moment, as if deliberately leaving her a few seconds to prepare herself.
“…He has someone he likes. He’s liked them for many years.”
Gu Jianian raised her head. “…???”
**Author’s note:**
Gu Jianian: ????? Are you seriously ill or something???
Calculating the area of Tingting’s psychological shadow hahaha.
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